My wife called me a mule. She once said, "I didn't marry a man; I married a mule!" I kept thinking about it. It was in the back of my head. I think it makes a good title for an album.

A gentleman is someone who can play the accordion, but doesn't.

Don't plant your bad days. They grow into weeks. The weeks grow into months. Before you know it, you got yourself a bad year. Take it from me - choke those little bad days. Choke 'em down to nothing.

We are buried beneath the weight of information, which is being confused with knowledge; quantity is being confused with abundance and wealth with happiness. We are monkeys with money and guns.

I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy.

when your down on your luck and you've lost all your dreams theres nothing like a campfire and a can of beans

I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.

The folks who know the truth aren't talking.... The ones who don't have a clue, you can't shut them up!

You have to keep busy. After all, no dog's ever pissed on a moving car.

When I was younger, I wanted to be older. Now I am older, I am not quite so sure.

Most people don't care if you're telling them the truth or if you're telling them a lie, as long as they're entertained by it.

I wish that death had spared me until your library had been complete.

I'll love you with all the madness in my soul.

Loving her, and being loved, was the only way I could hold myself together.

Only a well-rounded intellect, a spirit nourished in the eternal sources of intelligence and culture, of justice and wisdom, is a safeguard against both indifference and skepticism.

People seem to think that life began with the achievement of personal independence.

In time of war, the loudest patriots are the greatest profiteers.

A man cannot be comfortable [or cannot be made comfortable] without his own approval.

I have no intention of resigning, and confidently expect to resume official duties within three months.

All progress depends upon the unreasonable person.

My dissatisfaction with acting has nothing to do with being uncomfortable or vulnerable or feeling like people are going to criticize me. That's not the problem.