NASA sends probe to Uranus, people everywhere giggle.

I'm handsome, no ands, buts or ifs.

We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out.

Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!

For as long as I can remember, I've had memories.

Wives live longer than husbands because they're not married to women.

Did you know that..........'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me

This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.

Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin!

Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. It's not like the sheep was underage.

The only way to enjoy anything in this life is to earn it first.

No one leads people to Jesus; He leads people to Himself. All the pressure's off; just go love everybody without agenda.

A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.

Don't forget to vote for Bill Clinton and Al Gore. Stay home if you're voting for Dole.

National League umpires wear inside chest protesters.

Squirrel brains make you smart.

The Pell Grant is more than a financial aid program for college students in need. It is the right thing to do for America's college students, and it is the right thing to do for America's economy.

Faith has a powerfull effect In helping people recover a sense of Balance, tranquililty and hope.

Sometimes when we're incensed by the rancid tide of injustice, the impulse is to attack. We must avoid this. We have learned that violence as a means is always unsuccessful.

Women have never been a chief negotiator in any UN-sponsored talks.