Never anger a sci-fi writer. These people destroy entire planets over lunch. Imagine what they'll do to you.

Engrave this in your brain: EVERY WRITER GETS REJECTED. You will be no different.

If you want me to treat your ideas with more respect, get some better ideas.

I am not responsible for actions of the imaginary version of me you have inside your head.

I didn't mind getting old when I was young. It's the being old now that's getting to me.

Part of what makes us human is what we mean to other people, and what people mean to us.

I thought I saw him once, but it turned out to be a yeti

There's a difference between the fact that the universe is inherently unfair on a cosmic level, and the fact that life is unfair because people are actively making it so.

When you're a teenager and you're in love, it's obvious to everyone but you and the person you're in love with.

Christianity is a fine religion and I wish more Christians practiced it.

Don’t discount that part of who he was just because you didn’t know it. None of us are all of who we are to any one person.

And then depression set in....

The man who goes to the top is the man who has something to say and says it when circumstances warrant. Men who keep silent underdressed are moral cowards.

You don’t have a snail problem, you have a duck deficiency.

If one is only to talk from first-hand experience, conversation would be a very poor business.

Going to a site with more users seems obviously better to me, but at the same time, having a bland, middle of the road profile with bland, middle of the road pictures seems like a bad strategy to me.

I like to think I've been a good example and an inspiration to some people. And some people say that about me, but I'm just going about my work and doing what I do best. I'm a very professional 'Me.'

I walk around at 150-152 pounds to weigh 147 pounds. Other boxers weigh around 160-170 before coming down.

Individuals do not create rebellions; conditions do.

Before you speak, it is necessary for you to listen, for God speaks in the silence of the heart.

When you are in a room and your job is to write jokes 10 hours a day, your mind starts going to strange places.