Never look on the bright side. The glare is blinding.

A home without a grandmother is like an egg without salt.

If you ever meet someone who cannot understand why solitary confinement is considered punishment, you have met a misanthrope.

I simply like guns because you can't shoot people without them.

I wasn't used to children and they were getting on my nerves. Worse, it appeared that I was a child, too. I hadn't known that before; I thought I was just short.

Writers who have nothing to say always strain for metaphors to say it in.

If we define a misanthrope as 'someone who does not suffer fools and likes to see fools suffer,' we have described a person with something to look forward to.

The more immoral we become in big ways, the more puritanical we become in little ways.

God may have loved the common people, but a trip to any shopping mall suggests that He made far too many of them.

Golf is an exercise in Scottish pointlessness for people who are no longer able to throw telephone poles at each other.

Democracy is the fig leaf of elitism.

We are star stuff harvesting sunlight.

I felt, as I have often felt, that my failing the truth could have no bearing at all on the Truth itself, which could never conceivably be in any sense dependent on me or on anyone.

Its not your fault for not being there.Its my fault for thinking you would be

Money is a kind of freedom that can be felt and heard

Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else.

... the Kindle is a "roach motel" device: its license terms and DRM ensure that books can check in, but they can't check out.

If it's the ultimate game, how come they're playing it again next year?

Great cooking is about being inspired by the simple things around you - fresh markets, various spices. It doesn't necessarily have to look fancy.

The new specialty at the Iowa fair this year is fried butter on a stick. Of course, if you're like me and you want like to eat healthy, get your stick of butter baked.

Your painting is a measure of your mind.