Never, under any circumstances, let the Virginian wolfsnake near a typewriter.

Anyone who gives you a cinnamon roll fresh out of the oven is a friend for life.

Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or how often they should appear.

Temper tantrums, however fun they may be to throw, rarely solve whatever problem is causing them.

I didn't realize this was a sad occasion.

They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby - awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.

Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

The thing with your heart's desire is that your heart doesn't even know what it desires until it turns up.

Accidents happen all the time.

Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.

When plunder becomes a way of life for a group of men in a society, over the course of time they create for themselves a legal system that authorizes it and a moral code that glorifies it.

Customers are speaking to you implicitly via their behavior, captured in the footprints they leave behind in your systems.

Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.

If you want to meet a woman, it's best just to smile and say hi.

You know there's only two things more beautiful than a good gun--a Swiss watch or a woman from anywhere.

And with just 4 minutes gone, the score is already 0-0.

Tigress is my alternate personality, especially with children. I love animation because you get to do things you don't normally get to.

Poor nations are hungry, and rich nations are proud; and pride and hunger will ever be at variance.

Trials show us where we are and where we need to grow. Dont run from them, grow from them.

The people in your life who don't need an invitation still like to get one.