New Rule: News organizations have to stop using the phrase: "We go beyond the headlines." That's your job, dummy. You don't see American Airlines saying, "We land our jets on the runway"!

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

Abstinence from sins is better than seeking help afterwards.

You want a little talent on that?

When you're out there with thousands of people it's probably better to have a bigger show to look at, and it turned out really well and they videoed it for me.

Having unlimited choices can paralyze you creatively.

You cannot lift another soul until you are standing on higher ground than he is. You cannot light a fire in another soul unless it is burning in your own soul.

Life expects us to make a reasonable amount of progress in a reasonable amount of time. That's why they make those second grade chairs so small.

Every Christian who does not study, really study, the Bible every day is a fool.

The present always masquerades as a beginning; maybe we couldn't endure it if we realized at the time that it was a peak, or even an ending.

I did almost every job in the bank. It was real life, waking up in the morning, putting on a suit and tie and then having to go to work.

I came to filmmaking because it's my passion. I decided I can't have it distorted or marred by someone else deciding what it should be.