Next time you see someone sleeping, make believe you're in a science fiction movie. And whisper, 'The creature is regenerating itself.'

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

To experience peace ~ stop disturbing it!

You're not going to see my sense of humor on the football field. That's not a place for me to joke around.

I was quite solitary for 'Hitman.' I was quite apart. He struck me as a very sad individual. There was a mournful quality there.

Reality only reveals itself when it is illuminated by a ray of poetry.

If sitcoms were easy to write, there'd be a lot of good ones, and there aren't.

I can do a really high-pitched cartoon voice. Everybody always say they like that.

I believe we should all know each other, we human carriers of so many pleasurable differences. To not know is to doubt, to shrink from, sidestep or destroy.

You know I don't care if the world thinks I'm smart or not.

I believe if you work really hard and follow what you want to do in life that that combination - I believe in it. You need to take risks.

To form our taste, we must neither depreciate nor imitate, but we should understand and originate.