No health care for poor kids? You know, I thought something like that was only done by cartoon villains. You're (Pres. Bush) slowly going from being Nixon to Mr. Burns.

You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled by cases of police overreach.

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!

We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea.

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.

I've always liked Atlanta. And not just for the strip clubs, but the shopping and the food.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

I really like to put my name on everything, so my roommate doesn't steal it. It's really a throwback to that.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.

The only sin is the sin of being born

Life is a test of courage, It's only worth if you can learn to withstand your most trying times and remain stable, steady, simple and strong in different places and spaces.

I regret that I've been so busy with clinical work that I haven't been able to spend much time on experiments and outcome studies.

I grew up with a glue gun pointed at my head.

If you take a man by surprise, and behave with sufficient arrogance, he will generally do what you ask. -Emerson

Never idle a moment, but thrifty and thoughtful of others.

That's what I loved about Temptation Island. I don't even know why they did it.

Gold is the key, whatever else we try; and that sweet metal aids the conqueror in every case, in love as well as war.

I'm interested in the way major events don't necessarily announce themselves as major events. They're often little things - the drip, drip of life that changes people or affects people.

I'll be dead by the time I'm forty.