No matter how you hurry, you will notice at the end of the day that you traveled at the speed of time.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

What greater blessing to give thanks for at a family gathering than the family and the gathering.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that "Members not Present" and "Subjects Discussed" were one and the same.

It finally happened. I got the GPS lady so confused, she said, "In one-quarter mile, make a legal stop and ask directions.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

On a windswept hill by a billowing sea, my destiny sits and waits for me.

It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painter's eye, finding the essence that renders all else background.

If this is freedom, do I want it?

A society that has to burn witches to hold itself together is a society that has already failed, and just doesn't know it yet.

Sometimes, when we train, we simply have to go out to meet the Man with the Hammer

Wit lies in recognizing the resemblance among things which differ and the difference between things which are alike.

There is no beauty, if it doesn't show some of the terribleness of life.

The short, unhappy life of a corn-fed feedlot steer represents the ultimate triumph of industrial thinking over the logic of evolution.

To absent friends, lost loves, old gods, and the season of mists; and may each and every one of us always give the devil his due.

I have been a huge nerd to my kids. I haven't done the cool movies that they like. With '24,' I gained a lot of respect. '24' is now, it's hip, it's their generation.

ISIS and Al-Qaeda and whoever else, that is the only way they stop is after we convert. That’s what they say. The only way this stops is when the infidels convert.

The most important thing to do is to set goals. Training is a waste of time if you don't have goals.