No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.

Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.

You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.

If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you'll have a good life.

Don’t do your best, do my best.

I feel like I'm a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.

Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.

I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.

You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.

If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?

What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.

In our loss and fear we craved the acts of religion, the ceremonies that allow us to admit our helplessness, our dependence on the great forces we do not understand.

All the great blessings of my life are present in my thoughts today.

The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past not to worry about the future nor to anticipate troubles but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly.

[T]is not all fishing to fish.

When we read the right book generously, it can change the way think about the world around us.

A woman’s sphere of influence is a unique sphere, one that cannot be duplicated by men.

For athletes, the Olympics are the ultimate test of their worth.

I put the hamburger on the assembly line.

The truth is, I was always picky anyway.

On the last day of the world I would want to plant a tree