No one was there. Some teammates, huh? I guess they didn't want to get their lip busted like the gentleman I busted. Sorry for that sir.

The Big Cactus... because if you come too close, you're gonna get stuck.

I knew I was dog meat. Luckily, I'm the high-priced dog meat that everybody wants. I'm the good-quality dog meat. I'm the Alpo of the NBA.

They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn't always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

The stats win nothing. I'm still sexy. I'm still great.

You know, I'm very photogenic.

No one calls me out, I'm from LSU.

I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing, I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff or chief of police somewhere, either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet.

I'm not going to try to go out there and outdo him. I don't have to try to outdo him, I'm Shaq.

This summer is going to be a different summer for a lot of people. Everyone is going to take care of their own business and everyone is going to do what's best for them, including me.

I'm going back to the old Shaq. I was normal last year - I was an earthling last summer. I had to go back to my alien roots.

It was one thing to use computers as a tool, quite another to let them do your thinking for you.

Dominating others is not equality.

Renewable energy is far more labor-intensive than fossil fuel production.

Language is a very complicated thing, and that's one of the reasons why I like making photographs.

Try to do your best to look people in the eye and talk to them without a gadget being in between you all the time.

Semicolons . . . signal, rather than shout, a relationship. . . . A semicolon is a compliment from the writer to the reader. It says: "I don't have to draw you a picture; a hint will do."

The world is full of double beds And most delightful maidenheads, Which being so, there's no excuse For sodomy or self-abuse.

I once was lost, but now am found.

The calm, Cool face of the river, Asked me for a kiss

It is patience that reveals every grace to you, and it is through patience that the saints received all that was promised to them.