Nobody agrees with anybody else anyhow, but adults conceal it and infants show it.

Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.

Middle-age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, were it not for making living, which is rather a nouciance.

The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Behold the Zebra on the plains, And shudder at his mighty manes!

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.

When I remember bygone days I think how evening follows morn So many I loved were not yet dead, So many I love were not yet born.

Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

I spend a little time every day to play sports.

Also, I'd like to play an athlete again, while I'm still physically fit, or a musician, like Nat King Cole, because I play the trumpet and sing. I'd like to incorporate that into a character.

I feel that if Jacques Pepin shows you how to make an omelet, the matter is pretty much settled. That's God talking.

A memory is a beautiful thing, it's almost a desire that you miss.

It is better for a man to die at peace with himself than to live haunted by an evil conscience!

I want to thank everybody, all my fans in Israel, all the children, everybody, it's amazing.

It takes one second to ruin a woman's life.

Canada remains alienated from its allies, shut out of the reconstruction process to some degree, unable to influence events. There is no upside to the position Canada took.

Religious people find God useful. Gospel people find him beautiful.

Dessert doesn't count if you eat under an assumed identity.