Nobody but you and your caddie care what you do out there, and if your caddie is betting against you, he doesn't care, either.

My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.

Pressure is playing for ten dollars when you don't have a dime in your pocket.

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.

The older I get, the better I used to be.

You're Mexican until you make money and then you're Spanish.

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.

There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray.

Poverty only tries men's souls. It is loneliness that breaks the heart.

That which enters the mind through reason can be corrected. That which is admitted through faith hardly ever.

I have to say that elections, even in the most peaceful region, always make the hardest time for regional state institutions, including security structures.

Donald Trump got himself very far to the left. When he was considering running for president in 2000, he was for a 13 percent wealth tax on wealthy people to retire the national debt.

People hurried past, the others of the street, endless anonymous, twenty-one lives per second, race-walking in their faces and pigments, sprays of fleetest being.

We're still being challenged in Iraq and the reason why is a free Iraq will be a major defeat in the cause of freedom.

Sexual fulfillment is the banana life dangles in front of us just to keep us running.

In our town, the most popular way out was joining the service. So my three best friends joined the Navy to get out. I didn't.

I won't lie to you and make you believe what's evil, is making love, and making friends, and meeting God your own way... the RIGHT way.

Anyone can be tolerant of those who are tolerant.