Nothing very very good and nothing very very bad lasts for very very long.

Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.

Fondue sets, martini shakers and juicing machines: three things the world could live completely without.

If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure.

Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them.

Eagles are seagulls with a good hairdo.

We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude.

Is there anything in the world more annoyingly creepy than an unspoken dress code?

When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.

If I'd been born a ghoul, I think I would've killed people. I just happened to be born a human. That's the only reason why I'm allowed to live a moral life.

It is often easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission.

I never tire of reading Tom Paine.

You've got to have fun on the court. If you ain't having fun, then basketball ain't fun.

In my neighborhood... they view the police as someone who comes to take their loved ones away.

When there are no women on the tour it can get awful and ugly - constant horrible jokes and gross behaviour. It needs to be leavened with a feminine presence.

I cannot believe there is a god who punishes and rewards, for I see honest folk unlucky, and rogues unlucky.

Authenticity is too big a subject to just toss in with the question about the photographs!

There is one group of people - social conservatives, religious conservatives - who honestly feel that women's place is in the home and that wives should submit to their husbands.

Discharge my followers; let them hence away, From Richard's night to Bolingbrooke's fair day.