Now I'm in real trouble. First my laundry called and said they lost my shirt and then my broker said the same thing.

If you wonder where your child left his roller skates, try walking around the house in the dark.

Wall Street is a place where the day begins with good buys.

I told my broker that as long as he doesn't tell me where my money should go, I won't tell him where he should go.

My wife is really sentimental. One Valentine's Day I gave her a ring and to this day she has never forgotten those three little words that were engraved inside Made in Taiwan!

My teacher has a reading problem. He can't read my writing

Botox is as common as seagulls in Sarasota, but most of the women I know who use the dermatologist’s little helper still have full range of expression. Except squinting, of course.

Why do you look so sad?""Because you speak to me in words and I look at you with feelings.

I'll never understand ninety-nine percent of humanity. - Enoch

Truth and falsehood are opposed; but truth is the norm not of truth only but of falsehood also.

None of us is ever ready,' he (Ned) said. 'For knighthood?' 'For death.

Grind it out. Hanging on just one second longer than your competition makes you the winner.

I'm really excited about our DJ set. That's probably the most exciting of all. It's selfish but it's always your own thing that you're most concerned with.

The things you think about determine the quality of your mind. Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts.

God sees in you a masterpiece about to happen

For hope is always born at the same time as love.