Now, the band that inspired that great saying, "Stop The Music!!"

My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started.

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.

I’m Posting What Makes Me Happy, Not What‘s Satisfying you

i have to love myself more than i love him, in order to leave him.

I have a very close friendship with the skaters.

The freedom of all is essential to my freedom.

As adults, we try to develop the character traits that would have rescued our parents.

I was the freak who moved into the nice neighborhood.

That which you worry about most in life is seldom bad, and that likely applies to dying.

As a filmmaker, I want to be known as a pan-African filmmaker and this is because I think that we have more to gain as Africans than as individual countries.

The central challenge for any company, regardless of its size, is to keep doing a better job for its customers.

I'm going to admit when I'm clueless, and I'm going to ask people for help when I don't know the answer to something.