O charitable philosopher, I beg you to help me. My mind is weak but my soul is strong. Kindle that soul, and the sacred fire shall never be extinguished.

No, Sir, claret is the liquor for boys; port for men: but he who aspires to be a hero must drink brandy. In the first place brandy will do soonest for a man what drinking can do for him.

It matters not how a man dies, but how he lives. The act of dying is not of importance, it lasts so short a time.

I have discovered that we may be in some degree whatever character we choose. Besides, practice forms a man to anything.

My father had declared a predilection for heirs general, that is, males and females indiscriminately.... I, on the other hand, had a zealous partiality for heirs male, however remote.

I, who have no sisters or brothers, look with some degree of innocent envy on those who may be said to be born to friends.

When a man is familiar with many people he must expect many disagreeable familiarizations.

Quotation is more universal and more ancient than one would perhaps believe.

The pleasure of gratifying whim is very great. It is known only by those who are whimsical.

Melancholy cannot be clearly proved to others, so it is better to be silent about it.

It is not every man who can be exquisitely miserable, any more than exquisitely happy.

I think it is very good when people suffer. To me that is like the kiss of Jesus.

Christianity today is so subnormal that if any Christian began to act like a normal New Testament Christian, he would be considered abnormal

Celibacy sucks, no pun intended.

To love one’s self, this is the greatest challenge we are all called to face.

The difference between humans and other mammals is that we know how to accessorize.

A real ballerina must fill her space with her own personality.

You are a great problem-creator. Just understand this and suddenly problems disappear.

None of it meant anything, and all of it was important.

I'm a better editorial cartoonist by default because so many editorial cartoonists out there are so awful.

Life is short. You die before you think you're going to. Don't waste it in college unless you're doing something real. My view.