On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.

As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.

I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

Other countries care for their mentally ill. Making them debate on TV is just cruel.

The baby Jesus was the last homeless person the Republicans liked.

Call me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.

Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.

If its platform is any guide, the Republican party is staunchly pro-life until you are actually born.

The only possible reason the Republicans have declared a war on women is they must think women have oil.

If Mark Twain had had Twitter, he would have been amazing at it. But he probably wouldn't have gotten around to writing Huckleberry Finn.

Actions speak louder than voice but words hurt harder than punches

Father's Day was great, but all the family gatherings brought up my mother's death. Maybe it's me, because I am a wimp. We would get together, but there was someone missing!

The truth is that no internal reviews or congressional hearings will change the Secret Service's broken management culture. It needs better leadership.

David O. Russell is probably my favorite filmmaker. He's not only a great director, but he's also a great writer.

I am a strong believer that as one moves toward the future, the strongest and clearest way to do it is if you have a good sense of your past. You cannot have a very tall tree without deep roots.

Fasting is like spring cleaning for your body.

Good marketers see consumers as complete human beings with all the dimensions real people have.

Hey, we've all got problems, chum. I'm overly talkative. You look like a field of buttercups in a suit.

I'm not a period babe. Not at all.

I always try to create new experiences that are fun to play.