[On hearing that President Coolidge was dead:] How can you tell?

Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.

Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.

I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.

Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.

If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.

Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.

The springboard for your success is between your ears.

You're afraid of your own anger.

Everyone needs to prove they're strong. The truly strong only have to do it once.

...but [I] had sworn on the very day of my demobilization never to be under anyone’s orders for the rest of my life. Somehow I must live by writing.

Beautiful clear day in Beverly Hills. The sweet smell of Botox is in the air.

In the future, every industry should be an environmental industry. In a world where energy and carbon emissions are constrained, every business must take resource productivity seriously

The earth is suffocating... Swear to make them cut me open, so that I won't be buried alive.

We've had to overcome a lot in America to become a nation of progress. We still have a lot of progress to be made.

Grief is so far from retrieving a loss that it makes it greater; but the way to lessen it is by a comparison with others' losses.