On parties it's not about who you are. The real reason to which a party revolves is how good you look.

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.

I would just like to say that after all these years of heavy drinking, bright lights and late nights, I still don't need glasses. I drink right out of the bottle.

If you subtracted all of the great artists who never drank, who never went to excess, you wouldn't have any more art left. What kind of poem are you gonna get out of a glass of iced tea?

The perfect woman has an IQ of 150, wants to make love until 4 in the morning, then turns into a pizza!

When I die, sprinkle my ashes over the 80's.

I'm not conceited. Conceit is a fault and I have no faults.

Remember, life is just a game and no one gets out alive

If you want to split a bottle with a friend, then Sammy Hagar is your guy. If you want to split your friend with a bottle than give me a call.

If you put a Van Halen album in your record collection, it will melt all the rest of your records.

But sometimes, things are better to just hear. Some questions better left unasked. Some words better left unsaid. Because saying them doesn’t make you matter any less.

It is a misfortune of the times that all of us must needs be amateur economists-including, and perhaps especially, the professionals.

I had to sit down and explain to [her friend] that AA was for quitters

One in eight plant species face extinction.

In your daytime life you have to be more strict.

My perspective is if you're not willing to be called a few names to help out your country, you don't care enough.

I haven't been to rehab, I don't do anything eccentric - I'm really boring.

[My book is] a collection of letters and essays about what it takes to be a young woman today. Mostly the taboo things that girls don't want to talk about, but once we do we realize we're not alone.

I love complex characters - strong females who are vulnerable but have a life and soul. That's what I'm drawn to and what I enjoy most.

I'm not an anarchist, but I believe that people don't want the royal family - the so-called royal family.