One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.

Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.

Laughter is the closest distance between two people.

Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.

Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.

I don't mind growing old. I'm just not used to it.

Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I've seen statues of him on people's pianos.

You know, Junpei, everything in the world has its reasons for doing what it does.

When he's happy, it makes you happy too.

The outcome of successful planning always looks like luck to saps.

Practice in life whatever you pray for and God will give it to you more abundantly.

But there's times when I like to find the strange angles to something. People go, 'I heard a lot of jokes like that, but that's one of the most interesting takes I heard.' That's what I try to do.

I am an incredibly strong person and an incredibly fast person.

It is the nature of grace always to fill spaces that have been empty.

Anybody who says I can't do something, it just motivates me more than you could believe.

I want to inspire people to desire to see the praise that comes from the one and only true God. Above all else. That is what God has laid on my heart and the message that I bring to you.

Within the mind there are no lies-no possibility of deceiving oneself; and yet, somehow we all manage to bypass the safety of truth in pursuit of dangerous desires.