One can make a joke, but one can't be one.

For the majority of English people there are only two religions, Roman Catholic, which is wrong, and the rest, which don't matter.

I don't like men who live, by choice, out of their own country. I don't like interior decorators. I don't like Germans. I don't like buggers and I don't like Christian Scientists.

Wine has made me bold, but not foolish; has induced me to say silly things, but not do them.

Wine has lit up for me the pages of literature, and revealed in life romance lurking in the commonplace.

Wine has been to me a firm friend and a wise counselor.

Honor is honesty to what is, not blind duty to what you wish to be.

This is what I hate most about guys like you. You didn't even try.

Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

I write between 5.30am and 9.00. That way, I hope I carry over something from my dream time.

I never think about missing a free throw. All that goes through my mind when I'm at the line is seeing the ball go through the bottom of the net.

Why are people getting on elevators shocked to find people getting off elevators?

The Proustian aquarium: grotesque and gorgeous fish drifting with languid fins through a subaqueous medium of pale violet polluted ink.

You're looking for the best way of shooting it, but sometimes the best way of shooting it is changing the script.

There is no calamity greater than lightly engaging in war.

Humility is the mother of all virtues, courage the father, integrity the child and wisdom the grandchild.