One does not arise from such a book as Sister Carrie with a smirk of satisfaction; one leaves it infinitely touched.

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.

Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

What have I done?" he asked, his voice raw. "You used to be such a sane, sensible lady.""You took me on a journey into my own heart.

I repeat... that all power is a trust; that we are accountable for its exercise; that from the people and for the people all springs, and all must exist.

Travel tips: How to avoid carsickness, seasickness and airsickness... Be careful what you eat. And stay home.

I went from 220 pounds that I cut down for 'Moneyball' to almost 270-280 pounds for 'Ten Year.'

Rent is the portion of the earth, which is paid to the landlord for the user of the original and indestructible powers of the soil

People like to pigeonhole you.

I didn't want to be an actor.

I think everybody in this world should be loved.

McMahon 3:16 says 'I just pissed my pants!'

Seven wealthy towns contend for Homer dead, Through which the living Homer begged his bread