One man's toxic waste is another man's potpourri.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

I know this sounds strange, but as a kid, I was really shy. Painfully shy. The turning point was freshman year, when I was the biggest geek alive. No one, I mean no one, even talked to me.

My soul is not contained within the limits of my body; my body is contained within the limitlessness of my soul.

I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer.

Life opens up opportunities to you, and you either take them or you stay afraid of taking them.

150 people die every year from being hit by falling coconuts. Not to worry, drug makers are developing a vaccine.

Flowers don't worry about how they're going to bloom. They just open up & turn toward the light & that makes them beautiful.

I got a lot of support from my parents. That's the one thing I always appreciated. They didn't tell me I was being stupid; they told me I was being funny.

Ever since I started to get recognition I've picked out certain fans and reverse-stalked them.

Everything you gain in life will rot and fall apart, and all that will be left of you is what was in your heart.

In prosperity our friends know us

Plant a seed of friendship reap a bouquet of happiness.

Democrats are so spineless, so afraid to go against the tide... but dissension is the greatest form of patriotism.

People that could yodel always fascinated me. People that could sing loud always fascinated me. So I started trying to mimic at a really young age: 6, 7 years old.

The chief trouble with jazz is that there is not enough of it; some of it we have to listen to twice.

I draw the art for the writers. A lil' chibi of each author crowns their articles.

He who follows his lessons tastes a profound peace, and looks upon everybody as a bunch of manure.

The trouble about jumping was that if you didn't pick the right number of stories, you might still be alive when you hit bottom.

Sometimes I feel that the world is made up of sensible people who know the plot and bloody idiots who don't.

The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.