One of my favorite things being on movies is that when you're working, it's the best thing that's ever happened, and then in the downtime, you socialize and go to dinner.

If you have a dream, just lie about it. Lie your way unto your dreams.

Joel McHale is so money, he should be printed on money.

In prison, inmates sometimes use Cheetos and grape juice as makeup. I wouldn't use that beauty regimen around Britney Spears - she might lick your face off!

I loved New Jersey. I thought it was the greatest place in the world because on Halloween kids could start trick or treating right after school. Isn't that great?

I used humor as survival, as a weapon and as comfort.

People have always said since TV was invented what a cultural wasteland it is but I think it is the worst and the best. It is the golden age of television.

I think we are as screwed as a culture as we are saved as a culture.

I don't think the NFL had the slightest intention of taking me, except as maybe a water boy.

Yes, I would say my comedy is grunge, evidenced by the fact my jokes have put an end to big-hair glam comedy.

I knew I wanted to be an actor. I just kept saying, "Until somebody tells me to stop, until I have to go get a real job, and until I'm practically homeless, I'm not gonna get one."

Many sacred souls but same Spirit.

Humility and shame have been confused. Humility is knowing that you know nothing for sure and shame is someone having to tell you.

To become an astronaut, someone has to have a dream of his own to do something that he or she has always wanted to do, then commit himself to making that dream come true.

Social media is not rocket science. This, however, does not make it easy either.

Every summer Lin Kong returned to Goose Village to divorce his wife, Shuyu.

What really counts in life is the quiet meeting of every difficulty with the determination to get out of it all the good there is.

Novels are about men and women and children and dogs, not politics.

Politicians are like bad horsemen who are so preoccupied with staying in the saddle that they can't bother about where they're going.

If you've seen one redwood, you've seen them all.