One thing talk can't accomplish is communication. This is because everybody's talking too much to pay attention to what anyone is saying

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

Be yourself no matter what. People don't have to like you, and you don't have to care.

Commitment separates those who live their dreams from those who live their lives regretting the opportunities they have squandered.

Indian weddings are elaborate. As a culture, we like to celebrate everything Our weddings go on for sometimes a week, 10 days.

Not exactly hit them, but I've restrained a few people.

And I think that that emphasis on keeping a family together, alike, I think it's important.

The only way you get Americans to notice anything is to tax them or draft them or kill them.

There came into the world an unlimited abundance of everything people need. But people need everything except unlimited abundance.

It's funny to be pigeonholed so late in life but there we are.

Did they know why they knew? Not at all. But the Knew!

He who chooses the infinite has been chosen by the infinite.