One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control.

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie.

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

You know you're ugly when you go to the proctologist and he sticks his finger in your mouth.

Even this late it happens:the coming of love, the coming of light.

People will say anything, especially if they think it's what you want to hear. What we do is what matters. The proof of words is in actions.

Some people behave as though they are having an allergic reaction to feelings.

- It doesn't do anything obvious. But it might be able to do something in here. - Then she touched her hand to her heart. - Beautiful things sometimes do.

Prepare for Success. Feel the satisfaction and power of having your act together! Get organized beforehand to get better results. Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance.

There are no ugly women, only lazy.

It just happens to be that people like to associate poetry and rap music. I think that idea is kind of corny.

Stride forward with a firm, steady step knowing with a deep, certain inner knowing that you will reach every goal you set yourselves, that you will achieve every aim .

Donald Trump removed all doubt. He is running for president as a fascist demagogue.

I love Wal-Mart. You can put that down. I love Wal-Mart. My husband and I hang out there.