Only good questions deserve good answers.

The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.

Always forgive your enemies nothing annoys them so much.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

Everyone may not be good, but there's always something good in everyone. Never judge anyone shortly because every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

Be yourself; everyone else is taken.

Women are made to be loved, not understood.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

I sell my time to get enough money to buy it back.

I was sitting outside in our backyard on a summer day, I was around six, and suddenly the whole world dissolved before my eyes and I found myself in a timeless world of light.

The more keenly we are awake to the perils of life, the higher and grander is the possibility of being truly brave.

A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.

The glass is always half empty. All good comedians are manic-depressive.

God ordained for every man one and the same means of salvation.

Marriage is hardly a thing one can do now and then, except in America.

Unfortunately, many regard the critic as an enemy, instead of seeing him as a guide to the truth.

Some people dote on contemplating disasters.