Opportunity: A favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

We can all share with Nora and then she will have breakfast too!

It sure looks like [Vladimir] Putin did this [hack DNS site]. And we all need to take this seriously.

I like to set realistic goals for myself, not outrageous ones.

You are not superior just because you see the world in an odious light.

The Law is but words and paper without the hands of swords of men.

I think that I'm a really optimistic person.

Do it or don't do it but get on with it.

The rule of surfing is never tell anyone where you go.

A garden is a public service and having one a public duty. It is a man's contribution to the community.

Reason can get you to probability, but only commitment can get you to certainty.