Other than my hundreds of arrests I really don't have that much experience with the law. While the majority of people aren't corrupt, there certainly is an awful lot of corruption in this country.

Good memories are like charms...Each is special. You collect them, one by one, until one day you look back and discover they make a long, colorful bracelet.

Your mind creates your reality. If you expect nothing, you open up the universe to give you options. If you expect the worst, you usually get it.

A friend of mine once defined love as finding someone you can talk to late into the night

Some poeple just don't have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.

Oh great. Yoda captured us.

Who, last time I'd checked, was still on our official archenemy list. (Yes, we have to keep a list. It's kind of sad.)

They call me, The Sharkalator

At that moment I had no mind to change, or not change, or throw against the nearest wall.

I don't get a chance to be funny with the thrillers. I like to be funny, and I think I am really funny. So with 'Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life', it was fun to let loose.

I had to give him props, but how annoying of him to be a hero when I was trying so hard to dislike him. It was downright selfish.

I don't know much more than I did when I was alive. Most of the stuff I know now that I didn't know then I can't put into words.

I have a face for radio and a voice for writing.

Everywhere is nowhere. When a person spends all his time in foreign travel, he ends by having many acquaintances, but no friends.

At least no one's trying to kill anyone. Give them about fifteen minutes

Basically it starts with four months of training, just basic stretching, kicking and punching. Then you come to the choreography and getting ready to put the dance together.

Sometimes I fall into the trap of keeping too much to myself, but I think it's important to preserve certain things, it leaves something to the imagination.

Cynicism is more than a pose; it's also a handy time saver. By deflating your companion's enthusiasm, you can cut conversations in half.

I was not that pretty a girl and I was never pursued as a teenager or young woman, so I was used to having no shame and trying to get people to love me.

I - do I believe in evolution? I embrace the view that God created the heavens and the earth, the seas and all that's in them.

[Race] had no substance, like a shadowy shape that terrifies in the dark but vanishes by the light of day.