Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait.

I'm not an athiest. How can you not believe in something that doesn't exist? That's way too convoluted for me.

I am as frustrated with society as a pyromaniac in a petrified forest.

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Plant trees. They give us two of the most crucial elements for our survival: oxygen and books.

The past actually happened. History is what someone took the time to write down.

The very fact that the jaguar can become extinct while the Pekingese survives indicates to me that someone hasn't thought this thing through.

A group of white South Africans recently killed a black lawyer because he was black. That was wrong. They should have killed him because he was a lawyer.

Any good history book is mainly just a long list of mistakes, complete with names and dates. It's very embarrassing.

The Baptists' basic theology is that if you hold someone under water long enough, he'll come around to your way of thinking. It's a ritual known as 'Bobbing for Baptists.'

I never joined, but I used to go to church now and then. I liked it, because they always passed out plates of money at the end.

It's the possibility that keeps me going, not the guarantee.

Thus every matter, if it is to be done well, calls for the attention of the whole person.

GON. How lush and lusty the grass looks! how green!ANT. The ground indeed is tawny.SEB. With an eye of green in 't.ANT. He misses not much.SEB. No

I was covered in gore, dripping in slime, and in a very bad mood.

Once I started to value and respect my characters, I could really hear them. I just let them start talking.

Disappointment, discouragement, and despair are nothing but the bitter fruit of an unfulfilled expectation allowed to live beyond its time.

It's important to give back to the community. I want to make a difference in the world!

I think I was the only kid on the block who knew about furniture scale by the time I was 8.

We know that the president [Donald Trump] watches "Saturday Night Live" because he tweets about it. He doesn't like it, but he keeps watching it.

It is indeed difficult to make a living as a writer, and my advice to anyone contemplating a literary career is to have some other trade.