Our nannas are losers.

Junie B. Jones. The B stands for Beatrice. Except, I don't like Beatrice. I just like B and that's all.

A little glitter can turn your whole day around.

I don't really believe in pretending to be happy when you're not. Mostly I believe that you should burden your friends with your problems.

Even though sometimes you can control your anger, you can't control your sadness.

I was a good kid, but I was just very chatty. Teachers were rarely entertained, but occasionally a child was, which was enough for me. Everything was so urgent. I needed to say it immediately.

I'm not actually sure I'm grown-up enough for grown-up books.

My senior year of high school, I was voted Wittiest. So, several years later, I decided to try my hand at writing humor to see if I could be witty enough to make some money.

Can't we be friends?' I hate your guts, Frankovitch' Can't our guts be friends?

I don't even like clowns. Clowns are not normal people.

I find the term perfect child to be an oxymoron.

Oversight versus Insight: Most of us want to oversee the situation without insight of the situation. Knowledge is King.

If you can look yourself in the mirror at the end of each day, knowing that you did your best, or helped someone out, or took the high road and acted with integrity, then that is an awesome day!

What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet, isn't much better than tedious disease.

Military life is hard, even cruel—especially for the kids.

The American people want to have trust in their leaders.

Selling real estate isn't like selling stock.

This possibility bothered me as I thought it was not advisable to remain in one academic environment, and the long dark winters in Edinburgh could be rather dismal.

Videogames need more women and are too reliant on male, stubble-covered heroes.

The only intercourse possible between the knight and the dragon is battle.

You change the world by being yourself.