Outside every fat man there is an even fatter man trying to close in.

The first, indeed the only, requirement of a diet is that it should lose you weight without reducing your alcoholic intake by the smallest degree.

The rewards for being sane may not be very many, but knowing what's funny is one of them.

If you can't annoy somebody, there is little point in writing.

Only a world without love strikes me as instantly and decisively more terrible than one without music.

If you are using an adverb, you have got the verb wrong.

A bad review may spoil your breakfast, but you shouldn't allow it to spoil your lunch.

Self criticism must be my guide to action, and the first rule for its employment is that in itself it is not a virtue, only a procedure.

It is natural and harmless in English to use a preposition to end a sentence with.

Consciousness was upon him before he could get out of the way.

Women are really much nicer than men: No wonder we like them.

Truth may be stranger than fiction, but fiction is truer.

No free government can stand without virtue in the people, and a lofty spirit of partiotism.

Nothing is more precious than peace. Peace is the most basic starting point for the advancement of humankind.

The purpose of discipline is not to punish, but to correct.

So much of what we do every single day is the result of habits that we have formed over time.

It is better to starve than get a bad client.

Wherever the fear of God rules in the heart, it will appear both in works of charity and piety, and neither will excuse us from the other.

Anything in the entertainment business, there's sharks coming around. It's about staying true to yourself and making sure that, when you look in the mirror, you're happy with what you see.

The world has raised its whip; where will it descend?

We black men seem the sole oasis of simple faith and reverence in a dusty desert of dollars and smartness.