Oysters are more beautiful than any religion... There's nothing in Christianity or Buddhism that quite matches the sympathetic unselfishness of an oyster.

It's no use growing older if you only learn new ways of misbehaving yourself.

Children with Hyacinth's temperament don't know better as they grow older; they merely know more.

Find yourself a cup; the teapot is behind you. Now tell me about hundreds of things.

He spends his life explaining from his pulpit that the glory of Christianity consists in the fact that though it is not true it has been found necessary to invent it.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

Addresses are given to us to conceal our whereabouts.

Women and elephants never forget an injury.

The cat is domestic only as far as suits its own ends.

Poverty keeps together more homes than it breaks up.

You needn't tell me that a man who doesn't love oysters and asparagus and good wines has got a soul, or a stomach either. He's simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.

Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

I'd rather live life with the consequences of my choice than live with the consequences of fear.

However mean your life is meet it and live it do not shun it and call it hard names. It is not so bad as you are.

The income tax created more criminals than any other single act of government.

I have to feel good on the inside to look glamorous.

That's what we do on "MasterChef," on "Junior." No school teachers, no parents, let it go. You're going to go on a challenge. We're going to go to hell and back, and we're going to have some bumps.

Someone thought that I dropped out of Harvard. I am a college dropout, but I dropped out of Temple University in Philadelphia.

I'm quite a neurotic thinker, quite an adrenalized person. But after meditation, I felt this beautiful serenity and selfless connection.

How poor is the wisdom of men, and how uncertain their forecast!

Once a nation parts with the control of its credit, it matters not who makes the laws.