Oysters are supposed to enhance your sexual performance, but they don't work for me. Maybe I put them on too soon.

When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.

Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.

I'm very loyal in a relationship. Any relationship. When I go out with my mom, I don't look at other moms and go, "I wonder what her macaroni and cheese tastes like."

My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.

They should put expiration dates on clothing so we men will know when they go out of style.

Without comedy as a defense mechanism I wouldn't be able to survive.

I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.

I play basketball on Sundays and I'm a very spiritual guy; I read a lot of Eastern philosophy and I meditate.

Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with.

I'm dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into staying over.

It is a dangerous thing to substitute reading or writing for living. Live first, then write.

This flawless night sky adorned with crystal pendant stars is nothing more than a fragile glass of potential - shattered only to those who dare to break through it.

If you miss the first buttonhole you will not succeed in buttoning up your coat.

The worst that happened to men of science was that Galileo suffered an honorable detention and a mild reproof, before dying peacefully in his bed.

All of my children are the same way I am. They're little artists too, in their own ways.

But generally speaking, I felt to engage in the political process was to sully oneself to such a degree that whatever came out wasn't worth the trouble put in.

Even if I were certain that the world would end tomorrow, I would plant a tree this very day

Sometimes God calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage and He calms you

There is nobody who is so enlightened that they don't need to work on themselves.

Ed is very sexy because his emotions are really there - not forced.