Paper acts as an eraser on the mind, as soon as you look at what you've written.

People will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'

Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger biscuits.

Black Books adheres to a more old fashioned, traditional sitcom format, which I think works, because in its own way, it's quite theatrical.

You’re not an adult at all - you're just a tall child holding a beer, having conversations you don't understand...

Don't do it! Stay away from your potential. You'll mess it up, it's potential, leave it. Anyway, it's like your bank balance - you always have a lot less than you think.

I'm quite a compulsive person-I only worked this out recently - I'm compulsive, but I'm also very indecisive. I don't know what I want, but I know that I want it now.

Oh how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you, because there's not enough time in the day! Please GO AWAY!

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it.

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.

You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign Service for a while and then I drove a bulldozer, but neither of those panned out for me so it had to be stand-up.

I would encourage you: be informed - knowledge is power.

Reason is not automatic. Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it. Do not count on them. Leave them alone.

I believe Watergate shows that the system did work. Particularly the Judiciary and the Congress, and ultimately an independent prosecutor working in the Executive Branch.

The 'Hipster Nerds' like stuff because they hate it. It's like they ironically like it.

Houses are built to live in, and not to look on: therefore let use be preferred before uniformity.

Sometimes reality is too complex for oral communication. But legend embodies it in a form which enables it to spread all over the world.

With writing music, as a general rule I'm looking for something that surprises me, that doesn't fall within what's easy for me.

My dad is this very sensible guy who never let me feel that anything was beyond my station.

A spreadsheet for an innovative idea reports the mathematical relationship between made up numbers. You can't cash a spreadsheet.

Moving people into reality TV is a mistake.