Patriotism is as fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave, blind as a stone, and irrational as a headless hen.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

You are only free when you can grow wings of wisdom to fly away from the cage of societal conformity.

With her right index finger she slowly spells words on Grace's skin.Don't let me go crazy.The moon is pale and vast. The stars so sharp they almost hurt.

Rather throw away that which is dearest to you your own life than turn away a good friend.

I only read books I know I will like

My favorite chip trick is to make everyone's chip stack disappear.

I am a galley slave to pen and ink.

Home isn’t really a place. It’s the people who makes it what it is. I have a great home.

For me personally, I need to anticipate pressure and tuck the ball away.

It's just me and my guitar, and the rhythm's from there, and the poetry of life.

I don't mind a dirty girl. But what I find tragic is when we, as women, become not the subject of our own story but someone else's object.