People are content to wait a long time for salvation, but prefer dinner to turn up inside an hour.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Any fool can do something cool and look cool, but it takes skill to make something uncool cool again.

Anyhow, I've learned one thing now. You only really get to know people when you've had a jolly good row with them. Then and then only can you judge their true characters!

My favorite movie of all time is probably Apocalypse Now.

An artist chooses his subjects: that is the way he praises.

I am not lucky. I am the type who would go to Lourdes and drown in the waters.

It's a matter of each of the two churches being very deeply enculturated in its own setting and having difficulty understand the other.

Crosses, contempt, sorrows and afflictions are the real treasures of the lovers of Jesus Christ crucified

The fact is, my friends, most Americans don't want more government. They want less government.

Under loves heavy burden do I sink. --Romeo

Contention, like a horse, Full of high feeding, madly hath broke loose, And bears down all before him.