People do pretty ugly things to make themselves feel better, this I do know.

Just for once, I want someone to want me more than anybody else. To put me first.

Jesus was a brilliant Jewish stand-up comedian, a phenomenal improviser. His parables are great one-liners.

You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.

I don't care about money.

Charlie Chaplin's genius was in comedy. He has no sense of humor, particularly about himself.

One of the misfortunes of our time is that in getting rid of false shame, we have killed off so much real shame as well.

A flat black bug, that is London.

The baboon is driving,” I noted. “Should I be worried?

We are all miracles. What we do with the miracle is our choice.

Join the union, girls, and together say Equal Pay for Equal Work.

I work with pen and paper. That's my favorite way to write. I love the way the ink sinks into the wood, soaks into the wood pulp. There's something about that process that's so organic.