People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow.

Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'.

In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.

Someone once threw me a small, brown, hairy kiwi fruit, and I threw a wastebasket over it until it was dead.

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.

No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed.

Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated.

Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.

Dogs were not loyal but servile, that cats were opportunists and traitors,

Patience is passion tamed.

What the people want is very simple - they want an America as good as its promise.

Silence is as full of potential wisdom and wit as the unshown marble of great sculpture. The silent bear no witness against themselves.

Until you accept total responsibility - no matter what - you won't be able to put plans in place to accomplish your goals.

Only by you my heart always moves.

You had better all die - die immediately, than live as slaves and entail your wretchedness upon your posterity.

This constant, unproductive preoccupation with all the things we have to do is the single largest consumer of time and energy.

The key to a woman's heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time.

The knowledge that you can handle anything that comes your way is the key to allowing yourself to take risks. ... security is not having things; it's handling things.