People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.

These pretzels are making me thirsty!

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

The IRS! They're like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

So let me get this straight. You find yourself in the kitchen. You see an éclair in the receptacle... and you think to yourself: "What the hell, I'll just eat some trash."

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.

Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success.

Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.

Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV.

A prose that is altogether alive demands something of the reader that the ordinary novel reader is not prepared to give.

Wisdom is a sharp chisel to carve out your future.

As the births of living creatures at first are ill-shapen so are all innovations which are the births of time.

It's the most gratifying thing to have young girls telling me, 'I love that you do a photo shoot in pants and a button up shirt, and you still look cool.'

One by one the sands are flowing, One by one the moments fall; Some are coming, some are going; Do not strive to grasp them all.

The kind of music I like depends very much on my mood.

Don't be afraid to fail. Anything that I've ever attempted I was always willing to fail. You can't always win, but don't be afraid of making decisions.

After all, mirrors are only as truthful as the eyes that are looking into them.

Many writers profess great exactness in punctuation who never yet made a point.

Death does not frighten me, but dying obscurely and above all uselessly does.