Please don't get me wrong here. I'm not making fun of old people. In fact I think that's the goal of everybody here tonite. We all want to be an old person someday.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

From the cradle to the grave, joy and pain is the fertilizer for wisdom.

Those who are determined to succeed are those who eventually succeed.

To tell you the truth, I dislike anything that is in fashion.

How beautiful can life be? We hardly dare imagine it.

A man who thinks he has a higher purpose can do terrible things, even to those he professes to love.

I was an only child, but I did have a hell of a lot of cousins.

The media nowadays has given the message to adults. Don't try new things, don't look foolish because we will catch you and then broadcast it to the world. I think children don't have that.

When you work with great musicians, they are always a part of you . . . their spirits are walking around in me, so they're still here and passing it on to others.

And it took me, since I was 17 and left home, running from God, to now, as a 30-year-old man, when I honestly feel like I've come full circle and my heart's finally in the right place.