Please don't stand up on my account.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

Yomi awoke filled with the reckless energy of someone with little left to lose

The Bible said, as Chris quoted one memorable day, there was a time foreverything. I figured my time for happiness was just ahead, waitingfor me.

The Christians of today are so unsubmissive to the leadership of the church, this is unbiblical.

My mother was a public school teacher in Virginia, and we didn't have any money, we just survived on happiness, on being a happy family.

Don't let making a living prevent you from making a life.

The future is deterministic in principle, but not in practice.

Flesh-eating by humans is unnecessary, irrational, anatomically unsound, unhealthy, unhygienic, uneconomic, unaesthetic, unkind and unethical. May I elaborate?

Happiness perches on misery. Misery crouches beneath happiness.

More often than not, media coverage now mentions HIV-positive people in criminal contexts.