Pound notes are the best religion in the world.

New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment... a place where you're least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you.

It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody.

I have never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse.

They took away our land, our language, and our religion; but they could never harness our tongues.

The terrorist is the one with the small bomb.

I only take a drink on two occasions - when I'm thirsty and when I'm not.

I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis.

The only thing I envy in young people is their livers.

To say that, “I will not agree (will not accept)” is great egoism!

You’re not kissing my wife tonight.

Life can be mysterious- particularly if your in love.

I believe each incoming freshman [in college] must be started at once on his own research project if we are to preserve his secret dream of greatness and make it come true.

Uncomfortable doesn't mean bad, uncomfortable simply means you're doing something you haven't done before.

If I'm doing my job as an actor, the audience knows everything I know about the character.

When I was in 10th grade, I took one of those tests that's supposed to tell you what you should be when you grow up. The test told me that I should be a journalist.

Don't dream to be something but rather dream to do something great.

America may have great poets and novelists, but she never will have more than one necromancer.

Truth has to persist unaffected, in the past, present and future. That which is absent in two states, how can it be true.