President Bush is going to establish elections there in Iraq. He's going to rebuild the infrastructure. He's going to create jobs. He said if it works there, he'll try it here.

Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger.

They say there are about 12 million illegal immigrants in this country. But if you ask a Native American, that number is more like 300 million.

Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?

I feel like Bush presidencies are like "Godfather" films. You should stop at two.

I was Christmas shopping and ran into a guy on the street. I noticed his watch and said that it runs slow. He said, "So does the guy I stole it from."

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know? some of these jokes just write themselves.

Way too much coffee. But if it weren't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever.

Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late.

A relationship is a process. If you have nothing to learn - you have a slave to teach. 's why schools are effective.

I want to live in a society where people are intoxicated with the joy of making things

It's not your imperfections that make you attractive, it's your honesty about them that does.

You cannot tell an audience a lie. They know it before you do; before it's out of your mouth, they know it's a lie.

My career did start in the Spanish language industry, and that's probably because my father is my manager. He pushed my career in the direction he knew best.

Arguments are healthy. They clear the air.

Everybody has their own problems. No matter how big you think yours are, there is someone else that has bigger problems or different problems.

It's a profession where merit is not necessarily rewarded.

Learn not to add too many features right away, and get the core idea built and tested.

In rain during a dark night, enter that darkness.