President of the United States is you know, our boss, so you know, the President and the First Lady are kinda like the Mom and the Dad of the country. And when your Dad says something you listen.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.

So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.

Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.

The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.

Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.

You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best rapper is white.

New converts displayed a most un-Roman concern for the sick man.

Security and safety were the reward of dullness.

I express things through characters because I have a fear that my own voice is irritating because that's been said to me.

In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from.

I dont have a television. All I have is Netflix and Apple TV and Hulu.

Social media is like crack-immediately gratifying and hugely addictive.

This is not about creating a giant. It's about creating the sustainability of the steel industry.

Frankly, too many women treat their husbands as accessories instead of priorities.

There's no free ride. Someone always pays and if you don't know who that someone is, it's probably you.

If sleep is the apogee of physical relaxation, boredom is the apogee of mental relaxation. Boredom is the dream bird that hatches the egg of experience.