Presley's what I go by, why don't you change the station.

A gentleman is someone who can play the accordion, but doesn't.

Don't plant your bad days. They grow into weeks. The weeks grow into months. Before you know it, you got yourself a bad year. Take it from me - choke those little bad days. Choke 'em down to nothing.

We are buried beneath the weight of information, which is being confused with knowledge; quantity is being confused with abundance and wealth with happiness. We are monkeys with money and guns.

I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy.

when your down on your luck and you've lost all your dreams theres nothing like a campfire and a can of beans

I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.

The folks who know the truth aren't talking.... The ones who don't have a clue, you can't shut them up!

You have to keep busy. After all, no dog's ever pissed on a moving car.

When I was younger, I wanted to be older. Now I am older, I am not quite so sure.

Most people don't care if you're telling them the truth or if you're telling them a lie, as long as they're entertained by it.

Veganism is not a "sacrifice." It is a joy.

Not all men rape. Some molest and others observe!

God does not pay weekly but he pays at the end.

What is destructive is impatience haste expecting too much too fast.

If a guy was like, 'Let me serenade you,' and it was bad, and I had to lie about it - can't have it.

Thou art beautiful because God created thee, but thou art a slave to sin... wickedness has made you ugly.

There are so many talented young writers named Jonathan, with whom by comparison I suffer terribly.

The artist should not be satisfied to only play the part of a mirror.

Guilt is a totally useless emotion. It never makes anyone feel better nor does it change a situation.

You become excellent, and when you become excellent, no-one can take that away from you.