Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own.

Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth.

I love you just the way you are but you don't see you like I do. You shouldn't try so hard to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.

I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer

If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?

Laughter is the best medicine, y'know, besides medicine.

Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.

If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I'd still say no.

I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.

Maybe life on earth could be heaven, doesn't just the thought of it make it worth a try?

Where are all the sour patch parents?

I never lie. I believe everything I say, so it's not a lie.

Forgiveness heals any brokenness in the heart.

Affliction is the wholesome soil of virtue, where patience, honor, sweet humility, and calm fortitude, take root and strongly flourish.

My parents know how passionate I've always been about acting. I convinced them this was something that I was going to put my heart and soul into.

I got every Dan Shaughnessy book known to man.

Keep in view the common good of the people for all time.

It took me a while to get established - success didn't happen overnight.

Is Messi a real player or a Play Station character?

Levi's smile broke free and devoured his whole face. It started to devour her face, too. Cath had to look away.

I like the idea of company-paid dividends.