RECREATION, n. A particular kind of dejection to relieve a general fatigue.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

No poem ever bought a hamburger, or not too many.

Embrace love

You cannot contribute anything to the ideal condition of mind and heart known as Brotherhood however much you preach posture or agree unless you live it.

I get nervous around girls for the first time. Once I'm in, I can take the reins and go. It's just the initial approach I'm really bad at.

There is sexism - I'm not denying its existence. But I'm saying that I will deny its effort against me. I just pay it no nevermind and say, 'Get out of my way.'

It is for us to make the effort. The result is always in God's hands.

Although your physical body was created, you are the one who makes this body function. In other words, you are the divine life known as God. I call it a life branching out from God.

Masquerading the heart is the height of haunting souls.

To exceed the expectations of others, we must first raise expectations of ourselves.

I was playing birthday parties. House-rent parties where they used to sell whisky during prohibition.