RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.

Often we may even smile or laugh at adversity, but all people share the same passions. They are merely manifest differently according to one's culture and conditioning.

Joseph went from prison to prime minister from trials to triumph, from scar-weary to stardom

No man is as anti-feminist as a really feminine woman.

The sides are steep and the nights are long and cold down in the hole, light and love and the world above mean nothing to the mole.

Friends might be rare but they’re not irreplaceable

But scientists on both sides of the iron curtain played a very significant role in maintaining the momentum of the nuclear arms race throughout the four decades of the Cold War.

When someone challenges you, your supporters turn out.

To be premature is to be perfect

In excess, most endeavors and possessions take on the characteristics of their opposite.